Saturday, April 24, 2010


Once again, the issue on road discipline. Things I don't really like, but the people of Malaysia did it anyway. In no particular order.

Those pesky Singaporeans!!

1. Flashing lights from behind, making sure you get the fuck out of the way. This of course happens in highways all over Malaysia, but mostly in the North-South Highway. I mean, I get it, you're racing against time (or death!) but I can see you from my sidemirrors and I will get the fuck out of your way, but just give me some time to speed a bit and potong the car in front, my engine is only but a 1.6L, and I use 15 year old family saloon car. Most of the time, they are cars with Singapore plates (that tells you about their kiasu), BMW, Mercedes, Audi, some big SUVs, and sometimes Proton Wira! You better be careful dude, not every car have good safety figures. Especially if you have already altered that Wira so much. So, dont flash your lights at me! I know how to get out of the way.

Shit definitely happens when you don't tell people whether to turn left or right.

2. When I wait patiently at a junction, I say this honestly, the junction near my house, that one really need a traffic light. Its near the gerai goreng pisang and surat khabar, which are usually packed when people are coming back from work or when school starts/finish. I hate it when people dont use their light indicators! Come on la, kalau kau nak belok kiri, kanan ke, bagi la signal, make my life easier, ok? Ini tak, guna kereta mahal2, and then act like the road is your fucking playground. You are wasting my time.

Not tol Sungai Besi, but you get my picture.

3. Cutting queues when using toll booths. I was waiting patiently for my turn. Changing the CD a bit on my stereos, looking at the mirror a bit (checking for pimples or other unkown mishap LOL), only 4 or 5 cars left then I can take my ticket from the Sungai Besi toll when suddenly some fucker jumps in and try to squeeze his or her way in. Cibai.

If you are aware, theres a "white figure" at the back of the photo, near F15. Supposedly it is the spirit of a girl who killed herself by choking herself with exhaust fumes.

4. You're in the parking lot of a famous shopping centre, you're kinda late for a movie, and so typically, theres no empty parking space. So you go around and around frantically to find a parking space, and lo and behold, you found one! Then you are preparing to park back first, going reverse into the parking space, giving the indicator some more so people will notice, then some douchebag just force his way in and go steal your parking space. What the hell?? Where goes all the manner? Aku memang dah selalu kena. Typically they are guys around 25-28, with a typical douchebag-like appearance.

Don't you use that smile on me girl!

5. Motorcycle users. Specifically in KL. I know you're small, but please mind yourself and the others. Ok I'm stuck in a minor traffic jam, no big deal. But then off went motorcycles left and right, and they like almost always looked like they will hit a car, with their zigzagging and all that. Can't you just make your mind and use only 1 way? Plus I hate it when scratch my car, sidemirrors and everything. Carpaint are not cheap ok!!

See? Douchebags.

6. People who dont know how to park their car properly. Seriously, how hard is it to park a car? If its a sideway kind of parking, I dont really mind, but this is just some regular parking. These are the people who takes two parking spaces instead of one, or park too near my car until me or my passenger friend cannot get out of my car. Seriously, where did you get your license done mate?

Thursday, April 22, 2010

..smells like teen spirit..

Exactly like this, minus the Knightrider effects obviously.

Today, I'm going to have a say about road discipline. I got my "P" license when I was 18, although yes, my mum did secretly trained me in the art of using the manual gear using our old red Daihatsu Charade (now immobilised under the tree in our house, I think Edd knows where it is) when I was getting training for my driving license. We used to train in UKM near the Faculty Kejuruteraan building, shifting gears and stuffs. I was kinda worried if I was going to hit some monkeys on the way though, heheh.

Shit happens.

My first accident was when I was in form 3, when I was still studying in Bangi. My good buddy Afif was hanging around with his purple scooter in front of my house. Tellingly, mum wasnt home yet at the time. So I asked him if I could try the scooter, as it looked like fun. So he said yeah, why not eh. I underestimated the power of the mighty scooter. I just pulled the rev a bit too eagerly and the scooter went like a flash. And I hit a vase. And I broke it. Plus I made a bit of a scratch on Afif's scooter. Damn it. Swiftly, I cleaned the crime scene and pretend it never happened. Although I suspect mum somehow knew about it.

Yup, we are definitely lost.

Happily, after sitting for the driving exams, I got my driving license. I was entrusted with the cute little Charade. Having a manual gearbox didnt deter me, it was masculine even. I was just worried whenever the fuel indicator gets low. You see, after SPM, my pocket money wasnt really grand. Yes, we are middle-income class citizens, but my parents wasnt really splashing money on me or my sis. And well, after getting a license and a car, being a teenager, I was always going to explore the world. I was once lost near the area of the old Subang airport, with the fuel dangerously low, together with Zahid. Heck, I dont remember why we were lost in that place. So I turned off the aircon and radio, used the windows for ventilation instead, you know, ancient methods, and it was kinda scary because it was getting dark. Luckily we managed to find a way out and find a petrol station. Note to self, when going to unchartered places, please fill the fuel tank to the brim!

Kompleks Diamond, with some Cosway advertisement I must say.

My first car accident was something that even my family dont know about. It was post-SPM time, I had nothing to do at home, so I woke up at 11 in the morning on a Monday, and I was starving. I got some money, so I went to Warta/Bangi Utama to get some McD takeaway. This happened in the Kompleks Diamond area. I've put the McD tapau on the passenger seat beside me. When I was cornering, which was really damn slow, mind you, the coke just fell. So I rushed my hand to put it in a proper position, but the Charade wasnt a power-steered car, and it wasnt so smooth handling either. I lost my handling, and so I accidently scratched a bit of wall on the Charade's black bumper. Luckily no one was behind or infront of me, so spare me the embarrassment please.

Just a part of my mum's Honda City.

The second one was when I used my mum's Honda City. My parents went out in my dad's Perdana V6, and again, I was hungry, so I planned to go to the Tuesday's Pasar Malam near Shell Bangi. I was driving the car, waiting in line to use the roundabout, the one people also use to go to Tol Bangi and UKM, and I was the second car. In front of me was a Kancil with a huge "P" sticker. At some period, the roundabout was kinda free of traffic, so I assume the car infront of me was already moving, without me noticing if it had moved or not. But I was wrong, and I hit the back bumper of the Kancil. So we parked beside the roundabout to talk about settlements. I think I was surely fucked because I was just a kid with also a "P", and the makcik driving the Kancil had reinforcement in the form of his bro who drives a taxi around Bangi. So I said lets just settle this with my parents at home, since I dont have money anyway, and we drove to my house. When my parents arrived home to see some strangers in front of the house, they were kinda perplexed, and rightly so. But the pakcik taxi was nice, he was backing me up, saying that I'm just a brat, biasalah tu accident sekali sekala. I thought my mum was furious with me. Plus I was using her City. Years goes by without any incident for me.

Then occured the biggest accident for me in Putrajaya. I hate to tell it again so I'd just put in a picture.

Thats my car. The Corolla.

I wasnt driving fast, it was raining a bit, it was a downward sharply turned corner, and the road was slippery from the leaking oil of lorries, as I heard the other regular Putrajaya road users say. I bumped my head, just minor. The big damage was done to the front of the car. I'm no F1 driver, but I must say I did kinda well to still get that car on the road, away from the drain. Needless to say, my parents were furious, and concerned too. But in a week, I was driving again.. :D

Drive safely ok!

Sunday, April 18, 2010

..flavor of the week..

Man. I really hate douchebags. Oh. You are saying that they dont bother with my life? Well in a way they do. By just being one. They are such an eyesore to watch. And their attitude even more so. Acting like they have been friends with you for like more than 5 years or so, and then thinking that they can get away by doing stupid jokes on you or something like that. These are the people who always update their Facebook profile with something every random 30minutes or so, as if Twitter wasnt invented yet. I will say no more. I'll let explain it more profoundly.

The douchebag anatomy.

1. douchebag

Someone who has surpassed the levels of jerk and asshole, however not yet reached fucker or motherfucker. Not to be confuzed with douche.
Rob:He kept hitting on my girlfriend at the party, he just wouldnt leave her alone!!
Sam: God, what a douchebag.

Your average douchebag.

2. douchebag

An individual who has an over-inflated sense of self worth, compounded by a low level of intellegence, behaving ridiculously in front of colleagues with no sense of how moronic he appears.
Your boss is a real douchebag!

A special kind of douchebag.

3. douchebag

A person with a shitty personality that needs to "take themself the fuck down" or "go home and get their fucking shine box." A douchebag usually assumes the form of a hair-gelling pretty-boy but can also be described as an overzealous, pompous, or vexatious asshole that most people wish were killed with a Mortal Kombat fatality.
Damn, i thought "Beverly Hills 90210" won the permanent award for most douchebags casted in one weekly television show, but then someone had to go make that show, "Friends."

Somehow, somewhere out there, someone is a douchebag. Wanna share an experience what a douchebag to you mean? Feel free to comment.

Friday, April 9, 2010 legends , part I : goalkeepers..

As a kid, football in the TV was hard to come back by back then in Malaysia. Now with Astro and all the mapleys showing EPL every weekend , its a welcoming sight. In the old days, I would always wait faithfully in front of the television, for the EPL weekly review, showing all the matches in the weekend in 1 happy hour. That is, if I didnt fall asleep in the middle of it...I was in my primary school, so EPL matches and WWF Raw is War and Smack Down! was my staple every week. As long as TV3 kept showing it, that is. So today I'm going to share my choice of legendary football players, starting with goalkeepers, in no particular order.

Kasey Keller.

Sander Westerveld.

David Seaman.

Jussi Jaaskelainen.

Fabien Barthez.

Carlo Cudicini.

Shay Given.

Jerzy Dudek.

Peter Schmeichel.

Ed de Goey.

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

..invaders must die..

I'm so tired. The classes are making me crazy. The traveling more so. Since its now spring time, the snow has almost all melted away. Thus, making way for wind and dust. Really, I feel like wanting to wear a mask to class, but then, this ain't Japan. Here in Moscow, people stare at you for different reasons. Mostly, for not looking like them.

"Why don't you be normal and wear simple and unstylish clothes like us?!?"

The Japanese really cares about hygiene.

You are welcomed anytime!

Ok, now that's too much, kitty.

The public transport here is ok. Though they painstakingly try to lengthen the lifespan of some of the buses, trams, metros. What? You can just paint it in another color and people will assume "oh fuck yeah we have a new bus! fucking ace!!" with glee, but really, who are you fooling? During my trips in Europe, I can't help but notice that Moscow is far behind in terms of the styling and exterior of its public transport. The service I admit is ok, but I think people will want to see something new. But then, perhaps they think that if it still work, why bother changing it? For the sake of safety concerns and CO2 emissions, and being an eyesore, thats why!

I'm using this old fart to go to class.

I'm using this to do my dirty deeds in Amsterdam. A fucking Mercedes-Benz.

Why am I so emo in this post? Facultative Therapy. But the lecturer is nice though. Guess I need more time off.

Friday, April 2, 2010

..propane nightmares..

So ok. I do listen to alternative rock music, korean girl groups, bubble gum pop songs, mainstream Malay songs, J-pop, alternative rock, modern rock. But heck, check out Pendulum!!

Gotta love the bass~ especially helpful if you have a kick ass woofer. Heh. =D